Your Inverted Horoscope

horoInverted Horoscopes are an exact science, unlike standard birth-date based horoscopes, which are flimsy modes of vague speculation that speak strictly in terms of broad generalization.

The are two main distinctions:

When you open the newspaper and flip to the horoscopes section, read your entry backwards. From right to left, starting with the last word and proceeding to the start. This ancient hermetic encoding system allows blunt and naked truths specifically targeted at one particular person to be embedded in language which on the surface appears to be obvious, bland rhetoric.

Secondly, you pick your star sign by your death date, and not your birth date. If you are still alive and unsure of your death date, please check your birth certificate for its expiration date.

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