4 Out Of 5 Homeless Daleks are War Veterans

Unemployed Dalek begging for used batteries, collecting donations for RAG (Robots Against Greed)

Unemployed Dalek begging for used batteries, collecting donations for RAG (Robots Against Greed)

A new study released today gives some clarity to the rising phenomena of unemployed and homeless Daleks. Many return from combat with physical damage and psychological conditions such as Plunger Fatigue. Because of their limited skill set, many Daleks find it difficult to adjust to civilian life.

Jobs that are available do not pay what they used to. ‘Exterminate’ is no longer considered a specialized skill,  so Daleks subsist on minimum wage and working for tips.

Even in careers which require a trigger-happy attitude, such as many low level government positions, their infamous bad aim can easily become a liability. Daleks employed as can openers have caused more people to die from starvation than were ever killed by Dalek firepower, past, present and future.

There is, however, one silver lining to report. The Supreme Court announced last week it is a violation of Kaled Rights to fire a Dalek from any job which involves going up or down stairs. Employers are now required to install elevators, dumbwaiters or at least a stairway lift.

One thought on “4 Out Of 5 Homeless Daleks are War Veterans

  1. Don G Ward says:

    But don’t you remember that dreadful moment when we realized that Daleks can actually levitate?
    I think this piece is Dalek propaganda and any sympathies for the evil Dalek it may provoke are misplaced. If you see a Dalek begging in the street report him immediately to the nearest Time Lord and do not approach the machine. (For that is what they are).

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