New Study: Extinct Animals Were Mostly Bad At Capitalism

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A new government study reveals a correlation between animal species which have gone extinct in the last few centuries, and their lack of participation in the free market system. To put it bluntly, the species which no longer survive were lousy capitalists.

At best some of these breeds had attained a rudimentary comprehension of bartering. But most animals packs or other social orders do usually border on socialism or communism. Even the bees, whose own numbers have recently been on the decline. Despite living in a system of monarchy, essentially a dictatorship, bees have proven to be beneficial to the planet and to mankind. Unfortunately they have been unable to protect their assets, and are known to invest widely and foolishly.

Experts now place some of the blame on the animals themselves, for not adapting and embracing the simplest of financial concepts or even a common currency.

extinctMany say this is one aspect of a larger problem. Wildlife in general is unwilling to adapt to modern ways of life.

Even to this day, most animals refuse to cooperate in any established social norms. Governments around the world have invested money, time, and effort. They have installed ‘Animal Crossing’ signs on roads where automobiles and animals often intersect. To this day though, you would be hard pressed to find any animals actually crossing at the signs. They refuse to use them or indeed obey any traffic regulations. You would think they couldn’t even read them. Everyday, animals still haphazardly cross the busy roads and highways whenever and where ever they please.

Johnson & Grandparents

New Story Now Featured at Eat, Sleep, Write!

A tale regaling the early hey-day, the golden age of Time Travel.

It’s tough to find a good time time-travel provider these days, someone reliable and affordable. The commercialization of the Time Line brought the usual lazy capitalists into the arena, companies that built their fortune by billing for weight and distance in years of the destination. All of known history was soon cluttered and muddled, and it is impossible anymore to discern how long this has been going on or exactly when it started.

Some will say it was a mistake for Abraham Lincoln to make such wide and lasting declarations, praising the temporal transportation industry. Some of the older citizens among us still swear they remember a version of the Gettysburg Address without many of the paragraphs about time travel. It’s no longer possible to prove one way or the other. Anyone with the latest version of LinearShop Pro can go back and redraw it for all of us to recall any way they choose.

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